I really should try and work on my last 23 pages now. I'll do it after a little blog- and possibly some chocolate.



I've been thinking about masks lately. I know I wear one every day. In the literal sense of make up and in the sense that I try and make out that I can cope with all this when I know I can't.

A put on smile does not take away the stress or sadness. A stiff upper lip, or a head held high does not mean I can battle through my life right now.

I had a bit of an emotional break down last night. Everything got to me. I've been trying to hold it all together, but it's unraveling.

Even though I've finished my essays I feel like I have a mountain to climb. I'm so tired from CFS, uni work and my job. I just want to sleep and forget that I have deadlines coming up and a presentation to completely bluff my way through.

Sometimes I wish I didn't have the mentality that I need to please everyone. I can speak my mind without losing my niceness. And yet I stay quiet. It's easier than causing troubles.

On the outside I'm composed, but inside I'm screaming.